It won’t always be like this

By Liz on June 30, 2018

Over 7 years ago, when I was in the throes of caring for Karl … 8 months of cancer, not cancer, what is it and the last 3 months outside several times in the night … I thought to myself: “it won’t always be like this”.

And in the last year with Bear and particularly, the last 6 months when he needed help getting up and down and all that went with that, I thought to myself: “it won’t always be like this”.

With both Karl and Bear, it was a fear of what I knew was to be the inevitable loss, but also a wondering if I could physically and mentally go the distance. And even in the not wanting the loss of each of them, wanting “normal” life. But I knew “it won’t always be like this” and that helped me continue on caring for and loving them until it was time to let them go.

So, now … a puppy! Such joy, such love, such cuteness. So much heart healing.

So much attention needed!! It is sometimes nearly overwhelming even with all of the tools at my disposal: crate, pen, work from home …

It won’t always be like this. That makes me both glad and sad. Puppy time is so fleeting! If not for the notes I kept when raising Karl, I would have forgotten many puppy details. My vivid memories of life with Karl are of grown up Karl.

I am so thankful I kept notes. I also bought my first digital camera before I even brought Karl home so I have a LOT of photos. And of Bear. And of Bob and Auggie.

But back to Emmett and puppy days.

Monday, it will be twelve weeks since I brought him home. He is a bit over 4.5 months old. He is looking like a small version of the grown up dog and less like a baby dog. Pee and Poop is happening outside and all of the constant watching and dashing outside is done. Oh, there is still a LOT of puppy in him, but he has outgrown 2 collars and 3 harnesses. The nighttime pen barely contains him. The crate that fits in the Jeep is almost too small. His puppy teeth have been replaced by his permanent teeth!!

Gah!! My baby is growing up.

My personal challenge is to enjoy every day and to be the best human I can to my canine and feline companions … to lead and teach and yet allow them to be dog and cat. To look forward to grown up Emmett while enjoying the remaining puppy time.

There are days when I’d like a time out!! I said that today in the grocery … this is smallish town Montana and I’ve shopped the same grocery for 16 years so there are conversations in the checkout … and walking to the car, I thought … if I had a day without Emmett I’d likely miss him so much that I wouldn’t enjoy it.

Puppy days are intense and full and fun and funny. I love it and I am so grateful I get to experience it with Emmett and Auggie. Auggie remains THE MOST TOLERANT cat! He deserves a medal. I use some of Emmett’s crate time to give Auggie some one on one, but still. Auggie has accepted the changes in our lives and routine better than I could have imagined.

I tell Auggie: “It won’t always be like this!”

The other thing that won’t always be like this is the weather. We have had a perfect Spring and early Summer. Rain and sun and mostly moderate temperatures. The local organic farms, including my own CSA farmer have had wonderful growing conditions in spite of snow on the ground longer than normal.

But we are approaching that time when it is likely to suddenly get hot and dry … and maybe smoky from fires.

So, like puppy days, I am enjoying pleasant days while we have them.

It won’t always be like this.