Since I began this blog, in June 2007, I have lost 2 dogs: Karl (cancer) and Bear (old age), and 2 cats: Bob (age and illness) and Auggie (to a cowardly, soul-less human in a truck).

Prior to blogging, but while in Montana, I lost another dog and cat: Zack (cancer) and Gus (probably mountain lion).

Each loss has had its own unique path of grief and … recovery. Recovery is not quite the right word. There is forever a “hole” in the heart for the lost one and forever a place of love and happy memory.

Auggie’s loss has been particularly brutal for me. Auggie was such a beautiful creature: beautiful in body and spirit … affectionate as well as an avid hunter and a unique personality.

No, I am not in deep depths of despair and most of my days are spent in joyous time with Emmett, in this house and woods that I love, doing work that I enjoy, baking, cooking, crafting … but there are times … there are times when I miss Auggie so very much and have to fight a raging anger over a person taking him as well as a heartbreaking sense of loss that he is not here with Emmett and me.

There is one of those statistics about cats that go outside … something along the line of average life span being 3 years.

Auggie was 7 years and 6 months old when he died. He beat the “odds”, but I cannot say that that is any consolation. I have said to myself, whenever I have had a cat … a cat that WANTS to be outside … that it is better that they live their desired life, even if shortened … and I do really believe that, but as a human caretaker and lover of my pets, it is not easy when the worst happens.

I have had a dog and a cat most of my time in Montana.

I don’t know.

Right now, I am mostly peaceful about my household being Emmett and me.

I have looked at the shelter cats and dogs and tried to imagine adding …

At the moment … No.