The best thing about Summer is Autumn comes next!

So, I guess meteorological Autumn started 9/1, but the Autumnal Equinox was Monday (9/23) and 1 day into Autumn we have a Winter Storm warning: hard freeze, wind, cold and snow are forecast for Friday and Saturday.

On 9/12, the full moon and clear skies had me down to road to see sunset and moonrise.

And this week, with the forecast of a Winter storm, I have been getting firewood situated, hoses drained, everything that should not freeze prepped and brought inside. I have a list to be completed by Friday morning.

But today, Tuesday … a gray, gloomy morning turned sunny and we enjoyed!

I am over the moon with how well Emmett is doing off leash and that we are now able to enjoy all being outside in the yard: chasing grasshoppers, chewing on sticks, just being together outside – HEAVEN!

We had a spectacular day. Tomorrow is supposed to be sunny before things start segueing towards the Friday night/Saturday Winter weather. Meanwhile, we will enjoy and prepare.

A little over 14 years ago, I bought “Wild Thing”, my Winnebago Adventurer 33V. An RV. A Winnebago! On almost my 50th birthday. How cliché !!!

If you’d told me 15 years ago that I would have a Winnebago and that I would LOVE RVing, I might have told you that you were crazy.

Let me be clear. I do not “camp”. I like my creature comforts: hot water, inside plumbing, electricity.

Wild Thing (because she moves me :) ) is really a 330 foot (slides out) 1 bedroom, 1 bath rolling house. When I bought her, I had a full time/1 year work contract, was between stick houses and kind of thinking “was there somewhere else I would like to live?”. It was a perfect opportunity as well as since a 5 years previous car trip with pets … cross country and mostly in a different motel every night … I’d been looking and thinking about vans, trailers, Class C, truck camper. I seriously looked and dithered for 5 years.

And then, July 2005, I walked into an RV dealer and said I’d like to look at Class C, no slide but with leveling jacks. The sales person said: “Why not a Class A”. I said, “well … a C is kind of like driving a truck which I can do.” He responded: “Have you noticed all of the old folks at the wheels of Class A’s??? Let’s take a ride!”. So we took a Class A from the dealer, south along the northwest shore of Flathead Lake. You know, it is a funny thing… you sit at the wheel and all behind you follows. And, OMG! – the big windshield and the height … as a solo driver I realized that I could see more from an “A” than I would from a “C” or a van and I was sold.

Back at the dealer, we looked at some older “A’s” … no slides, jacks. The Winnebago was next to one of those … slides out. I looked. I was smitten by the kitchen and the shower. I am a lousy “poker face”/negotiator. Bottom line, I paid more than I probably should have but honestly … NO regrets.

Fast forward 14 years later. I’ve full timed for 7 plus months, travelled 4-6-8 weeks per year and then 4 years ago, my dog Bear was unable to negotiate the steps. I looked at options for entry assist and ultimately decided to not RV and give him his final year(s) in my no steps, 1 level, home in the woods. January 2018, his poor old body was done. In April 2018, Emmett came into Auggie’s and my life. Now, with Emmett doing well on house manners and leash and off leash, I started thinking about RVing and getting Wild Thing in shape to travel. And then the work situation.

As I am cleaning up “Wild Thing” and addressing several maintenance items … and dealing with the work uncertainty … I have been watching a variety of YouTube channels … looking at various YouTube/blogs/Instagram/Books about various topics has been so helpful in helping me think about “next steps”. At any rate, one of my favorite YouTube channels is CreativityRV: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCigPwB_DERbV5BlwV4OY9mw/videos

Robin from Creativity RV is a great speaker/youTuber/RVr !! I thought I knew a lot. I have learned a lot and via another viewer responding to my comment, I found Boondockers Welcome: https://www.boondockerswelcome.com/

Boondocking is “parking” an RV at a spot with no hookups and thus subsisting off battery power (often solar assisted), generator, on board water, on board propane: dry camping. Boondockers Welcome is an organization that allows people like me with property that allows me to have an RV park for a few nights on my property, match with RVrs that like to Boondock. As a host, I do not receive money, but I do receive credit for membership dues at Boondockers Welcome so that when I RV, I can stay at other hosts.

I joined as I thought it would be fun and interesting and I really did not overthink other than … I have room.

From my first guest just after I signed up to my second guest last week to welcome emails from other hosts to blog comments and private emails … I am a bit overwhelmed at the support that came to me at a time that I did NEED support although I didn’t realize it :)

It is something that has happened time and time again: during a challenging time in my life, when I think I am dealing with all of it … and then an opportunity to actually talk about it with people who have NO stake in the outcome … and other stuff shakes loose. That is what happened and it has been good.

My work situation is still unresolved. It was supposed to be 30 days, it is now 60 days and I imagine it will be another 30-60 before anything is decided at my long time client.

Moving on! It is September 2: Labor Day Holiday and I’m taking the holiday! And then, I’m working much more seriously on several ideas I’ve explored in the downtime. I need to get back to work!

Meanwhile, I am so very grateful for all of the small events and explorations and conversations that have inspired, motivated and taught me to look at various options.

It is both a scary and exiting time.

Onward!

***Edited 9/3 to add Wild Thing lyrics

“From CBS Sunday morning: Barbara Van Cleve is 84, born and bred in Montana, and she still runs cattle with the best. She is also a photographer with a passion for chronicling the ranching life she learned as a child, especially the lives of ranch women. Barry Petersen reports.”

I want to be Barbara Van Cleve’s BFF! Because … she is passionate about ranching, horses and photography! Passion being the key word. I am always drawn to people who are passionate about some good thing. I do not know Barbara except via a short CBS Sunday morning video. But she is a person who LIVES. To me …. a hero, a role model, a reminder that no matter how things are in my life, for myself to always return to those things that I love.

THAT – living life with passion, with heart – THAT is living the God given life and I hope, hope, hope that I NEVER forget that!

Yes, I am starting my fifth week on hiatus from work … but week 1 was 4th of July week.

And the last 2 weeks, I was asked to do some tasks: small-medium but I really enjoyed them and it is keeping my “head in the game”!

I am VERY much enjoying this time of not working and thinking “what do I want to do” if the normal work does not come back. While it is a strain on the budget, I’ve done all of my “what ifs” so have remained (mostly … I AM human :) ) focused on several new work ideas.

Without going into specifics, I started down a path of … I don’t think I want to pursue the same type of programming. This is mostly because I don’t think, that at my age of nearly 64, I would be comfortable as part of a new team, i.e. do I want to work with a group of young hot shots?? … ummm, probably not. Generalization, pre-judging probably … still, it’s a funny mix of experience (coding plus business operations) that makes me loath to try to do what I’ve been doing with a new group.

So, then I started thinking about non-programming things I like and could do. Many of those would require me to conform to a schedule and/or be gone from the house … If I need to, yes I will, but in thinking about some of those options and then with the little tasks of the past 2 weeks, I came back to what I would really like (prefer) is some sort of programming/computer work that allows me a certain amount of flexibility.

So, full circle. But not a new group.

But, in the last 2-3 weeks it occurred to me how much fun and joy there was in thinking these things through and really knowing what I’d like my days to look like. I feel incredibly fortunate that I have had this opportunity to explore my options. In the day to day work of the past years, I *thought*, I’d thought about things, but the reality was that as the work was paying the bills and I enjoyed it and my work group … I did not think about things as I have now that I might need to actually change … adapt…

Change!!

As noted in the previous post, I continue with my list of house (RV) and property chores, ideas for income … including meeting with some local folks as well as some online research.

I’ve stepped up off leash training with Emmett and he is doing VERY well! It is so much fun to be out with him and Auggie and just doing bits of stuff in the yard. I only need to yell “Sprinkler!” to get Emmett running for the well head pump handle which he KNOWS I need to pull to start the fun.

To date (I hate to even write this and alert the weather gods…), we are having a very pleasant summer … I know … you did not expect me to put pleasant and summer in the same sentence!! I keep waiting for the “heat” as last winter did not arrive until late January and now it is late July so …

Thursday is August 1 and the start of BIRTHDAY MONTH. Whatever the next days bring, heat, work, no work … we are ready.

Five weeks: full circle … Happy Days!

Any long time reader of this blog knows that I am NOT a fan of July and early August… 4th of July stupidity of fireworks, followed by heat and wildfire and local influx of visitors (good for economy, kind of a pain for me :) but I bow to sharing the beauty of this area!)

The 4th stuff is not too bad with Emmett and Auggie as I worked with both to teach not to be concerned. Whether my teaching or their personalities … they are good. I am horrified that I did so badly with Karl on this. Karl was not good with loud/surprise noises from a little pup and I did not know then how to help him. So the 4th brings up that guilt and sorrow as well as concern for combat veterans who suffer with the sounds and sights of war that many equate with “patriotism” … this makes me livid!

But. Almighty $$. Etc.

Onward.

I am now on hiatus from work. As of the last post, things have improved from being “we won’t know for 3 months” about next contract to “we’ll know in 30 days”. 30 days … piffle compared to 3 months :)

But, I had thoughts and contingency plans/ideas and what ifs. Per the last post, I was confident (97% of the time!) that something would work to keep my house and stay guardian of the woods. It feels even better at the moment and while I am still thinking and kind of planning, I am mostly enjoying a month “off”.

I have a list(s): things to do, things to bake, things to cook, books to read, videos to watch, training/teaching things with Emmett.

I am not sure one month will be enough. I think I could do retired. But I also love the programming work so I really do hope that continues.

Meanwhile:

I have been exploring heirloom flours: Spelt and Einkorn I really LOVE and this bagel – YUM

Einkorn … what a great grain:

I also made Rye Chocolate Chip Cookies topped with flaked salt. They are on my Instagram along with a link to the recipe. Fortunately, the dough freezes wonderfully and I baked 4 to start and will exercise some willpower on baking the rest 2 at a time!

My list of things to do included some yard work and one of the fun projects was some new pretty things for the front porch:

The succulents on the shelf have been doing well, so I bought more as well as some ground cover plants and am experimenting with how those do by the front porch with the idea that I might do some planting all along the porch.

So, every morning after walks and breakfasts and a bit of sitting and enjoying my last cup of coffee … I select some things from my list: one outside chore to do before it gets hot, one inside chore or task**, and one idea for income to explore or think about.

**one task is a blog update that involves some underlying infrastructure WordPress changes and might result in the blog being down for a bit.

The ideas for income … I’m trying not to think $$$ so much as what would I like to do and then … is there a way that might generate income. I have a number of things rolling around in various stages of thinking about and researching. Even if the work contract resolves and I continue with that, I hope to keep working on the other ideas.

So, my days are full, despite it being my least favorite time of the year, I am enjoying as much time as possible outside with Emmett and Auggie and continuing on training and teaching with Emmett although hopefully he sees all of that as play since we have fun! I keep the training energetic, intersperse it with a game and stop when we get hot and tired!

On with July!

There is a book by Alan Watts with the title “The wisdom of insecurity”. I read it … well slogged through it … about 12 years ago. I was 1 year into owning my current home. Some property maintenance was costing more than I’d anticipated and I had to make a decision whether to do the work or “play it safe”. I did the work. At the time, I felt strongly that I had been able to acquire this property for a reason … and that part of that was that I needed to properly care for it … the woods.

I have been an independent computer programming consultant, self-employed for nearly 34 years. In all of that time, there has been no guarantee from day to day that I would have work or income the next day. That seems unusual, but if you REALLY think about it, it is not. Anyone, real job or not, can be without work in the blink of an eye. We tend to think that “jobs” have some security. The reality is that they do not. Ask the employees of Jamie Oliver’s restaurants!

Another truth: none of us … NONE of us is guaranteed to see the next sunrise. A freak accident, being in the wrong place at the wrong time … just because we do not have a life threatening disease does NOT guarantee any of us a tomorrow. So. I REALLY believe in the wisdom of insecurity! I believe that we need to step back from a position of feeling in control and accept that insecurity is THE name of the game!

Despite the real insecurity of life, most plan for the future. While I typically operate on the “I’ll be here tomorrow” agenda, I am not a great planner. I am more of a “go with the flow” person. BUT, I do budget by cash flow. Since my “employment” future is of the variable nature, I plan so as not to live “paycheck to paycheck” and to be able to absorb some fluctuation in income.

AND, since my “contract” is renewed yearly and that process is never certain AND end of June is the renewal time … AND this year I was apprised that the uncertainty level was VERY high… I started thinking about options.

GASP! I went into a kind of planning mode: what will I do if …

It was a crazy place to be. I went so far as to contact a realtor for a “current market analysis” per the postcards I’d been receiving… in case I needed to sell up and “retire”. Good news/bad news. The “CMA” was produced in what I consider an historical accountant’s view, i.e. it was NOT a CURRENT market analysis, it was an analysis based on history and that history was 2 plus years old. Still, it threw me for a loop.

But, I regrouped and challenged the premise … NOT the final number, the premise.

AND, I changed my perspective back to my normally optimistic state of mind which is: I have always, ALWAYS had what I need. That is NEED, not want :)

In mid-April, before I’d been advised that my work situation was iffy, I bought a ring called “Little Hoot”. It is a Barred Owl. As I noted on my Instagram, I love owls and have seen and regularly hear Barred Owls. Additionally, the symbolism of owls (to me) is wisdom.

Before I’d received the ring, I heard the work news.

So. Wisdom potentially needed.

In a way, I panicked. I so hate admitting that, but in hindsight, it is the truth. On the other hand, one of the ways that I deal with insecurity and/or risky decisions is to go the place of “what if the worst happens, what will I do”. And dealing with that frees me from most of the fear and allows me to focus on positive, “normal” living: HOO RAH!!

AND THEN!!!

And then, having reached a calmer state, walking with Emmett and Auggie … mid-morning, i.e. full light … I heard a Barred Owl! Mid morning. I was completely taken aback but after my initial surprise, my first thought was: that means that I am to stay here and continue to take care of this woods.

Call me crazy, but that is what I believe. And so, I stepped forward … like Indiana Jones stepped out in faith on the unseen bridge. (Google “Indiana Jones Step of Faith”)

This past week, I received a “Monks of New Skete” monthly newsletter. One of the articles is titled “Spiritual Rest”. The gist is that sometimes we find ourselves in a “frantic state”.

Frantically wanting something, frantically trying to keep something, frantically avoiding something, frantically seeking God to intervene in my wanting, trying, avoiding. All this frantic emotion manifests itself in physical discomfort and pain, adding further to the frantic state.

Matthew 6:25-34 comes to mind…

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?

Right, then.

I trust in God, in myself, in my knowledge and experience and as so much of my life has rolled out in unexpected, but delightful, joy … Onward!

On this Memorial Day, a day when we (in the U.S.) remember those who paid with their lives to give us freedom, I would be less than respectful of that sacrifice if I gave in to fear for my own future.